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Dad on Alert, Daughter may be in trouble

From: cbxsage
Date: 29 Jun 2003
Time: 20:08:47
Remote Name:


I have been divorced for 18 mos. from a 7 year marriage. My ex and I have a wonderful loving parentified 7 year old daughter, whom I have only visitation with, who was sexually abused by my ex's Step father when she was almost 4. We relocated and all got great couselling throughout the recovery ordeal. I do not believe that anyone can completely recover from this. Anyway, my daughter did better in therapy than we did. Although the time is behind us, it's not forgotten and the ripples are still there from time to time. As a father my natural instinct is to protect my daughter from any harm or further abuse. My dilemma is that my ex has gotten involved with paganism and some sexual conduct which I am not sure is healthy for our daughter to be exposed to. A mutual friend has been keeping me posted on emails and postings to an internet group she has belonged to for 6 months. I believe this person to be credible and honest about what she is forwarding to me from this private group. As a result I have passively collected over 100 postings and emails which both blatantly and graphically detail her change in attitude which has also begun to show to our daughter who is becoming confused. One example is that my ex recently sent me an email informing me in detail how she had to 'spank' our daughter for the first time in her life! Simply because she would not mind her in a minor situation. I realize that kids react differently to each parent, but we (my ex and I) made a solemn vow never to raise a hand to our daughter in anger. I felt the succeeding paragraphs were all about justification of her anger and response. Also my ex has a 12 year old girl, from her first in which she has visitation, not custody. I have slowly seen an erosion taking place between the two girls, where I have witnessed the older girl hitting the younger and then manipulating her mother into believing her. Although my input was there, it was taken with a grain of salt. So from this I am concerned about emotional and physical abuse. But my main concern is worse than that. Earlier this week I recieved a forwarded post from the mutual friend in her group. In this post my ex discussed her sexual activities explicitly, which included an open invitation to anyone on the net to watch her and her boyfriend in action, it came complete with time and webcam address. She was also proud of an "outdoor" adventure in the bushes while the girls were playing in a river. Our seven year old is not a good enough swimmer to deal with the currents on her own, and her sister does not react well enough to her emergencies to watch over her alone, while her mother is busy in the bushes. I guess some might think my concerns are unfounded, so before I bring this info to Child Protective Services, I would appreciate input from anyone in the know.

Thanks Bill

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