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Re: I have filed for modify of custody

From: momof3
Date: 29 Jul 2003
Time: 03:43:49
Remote Name:


Mom, I have been some what in your shoes. My mom who allowed me to be abused as a child and then left my child with an abuser was told by CPS that she wasn't allowed to visit my children anymore. So she threatens to call CPS and say I was also physically abusing them. You and only you know what you've done and what you've not done. If you are found not guilty in court and get custody of those children back, your best bet would be to do as I have had to do. Tell your parents to BUTT OUT!! Leave you alone to grow up and raise YOUR children!! Tell them they are only grandparents and nothing more and if they EVER interfer even ONE time, that they will no longer be allowed to visit, call or anything. Then see about having a restraining order placed against them BOTH. One thing that you DO need to do and RIGHT NOW, is to get your children and yourselves in counseling!! Your child(ren) are suffering from mental abuse. They are so confused. I can hear it in what you're saying. They are acting out, because they don't know what else to do. They are hurting!! All this fighting, etc... is doing nothing for them but causing them more problems. They have to be feeling pulled apart in two different directions. And YES keep them out of all of it. Don't talk about it around them, unless it's in court or in theraphy. It will also help you and your hubby to take Parenting classes also. That will also look VERY good in court. Check with your local mental health clinic. Most times they have free workshops that won't cost you a penny!! But I would consider(hard) keeping YOUR parents away from YOUR children.Because if the grandparents are causing problems by telling the kids opposite of everything you tell them, or break every rule you make, the kids ARE going to see you as the "BAD" parents. If there's only one side, then there is less confusion. You can't change the past, only learn from it, to make the future brighter and happier for all, but also remember you can't be "super mom", just keep your nose clean and be good to your children.

I hope this has helped and not confussed you even more. And I wish you luck. Because I stepped up and confronted my mom, we all live happily now and she knows her opinions doesn't count in my house, for my children. Good luck!

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