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Is it really worth it??? NEED ADVICE PLEASE!!

From: Only_Human
Conditions of use: accepted & agree
Date: 28 Dec 2003
Time: 20:46:07
Remote Name:


I found this site 2-3 days ago. I'm so at a loss and even more confused then what I was when I started. It seems as though no matter what when dealing w/ the family courts it's a NO WIN situation. Of course there are a few that had things turn out the 'right' way. But there is seriously NO guarantee. This really makes me question everything now. Do we even want to entertain the possibility of spending SO much money and being told 'no' when we KNOW what the best interest of the child is??? Here's my scenario and just some things that we think are important and a judge should hear. PLMK if you think it's enough for a case. SS is at g'ma & g'pa's just about 24/7 (we have almost 4 years of phone bills showing this) He still 'poops' his pants at 6.5. Basically they are skid marks and to us they are no big deal but he becomes very skiddish and quiet (those aren't the words I'm looking for!)and instantly asks if we are mad. One instance 2 years ago he actually curled up into a ball crying begging my dh NOT to 'beat' him. Which we've NEVER laid a hand on him! Mom is unwilling to work w/ visitation. It takes us usually 3 months to come to an agreement for summer visit & 2 months for Christmas visit (which is only 2 weeks to chose from mind you) Calling him when he is out here and 'scolding' him over the phone. Everything that happens is an accident, including biting our dd (5's) arm this summer in the car. He is still in pull ups at night. We think BM has a man staying the nights (when he's in town, he's a truck driver) it specifically says NO cohabitation in the divorce. Refusal to sign of WRITTEN (return repceit, certified) mail. Sending size 2T clothes out for visits. SS is saying off the wall things out of no where. (My mom can be nice sometimes while watching a movie and everyone was quiet) Begging dh NOT to take him home and having nothing short of a meltdown. What is the BEST way to deal with this? Mandated visits? (we are working w/our atty on this one) How do we go about getting a psych eval that will stand up in court on him? Would a home study be beneficial? Should we hire a PI to find out what is going on? Buy a hidden camera w/ microphone to 'show' what he is doing? Is that even admissable in court? Where do we begin? Do we have a chance of getting my AWESOME ss out of emotional (Definately)& physical (probably) hell? We have a woman judge who isn't too keen on men UNLESS they have ALL of their i's dotted and their t's crossed. ANY AND ALL ADVICE MORE THEN WELCOME!! I will so seriously appreciate! Thank you SOOOOOOO much~ Only Human

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